Love is a word that is frequently used in life ,in songs etc, but do people really understand Love and what it is to love?
Love means different things to everyone and at different stages of our lives. How would you describe love? Your response will probably be based on your life outlook, experience and conviction, that is. what you believe or stand for.
Some described it as “A feeling you feel when you feel a feeling you have never felt before” Because love is deemed as a feeling, man can easily say he fell in or out of love as though it is a something you can switch on or off. Love is more than just feeling of deep affection for or attachment or devotion to a person or person. Love brings something different to your life. There are four dimensions of love according to Greek philosophy Philia Love – affectionate caring but not erotic; brotherly love that exists between good friends, people who share a common perspective of life
2. Storgē – family love; between parents and children, between siblings. Love that a parent has for a child irrespective of where the child is; blood relationship or not.
3.Éros– This is sensual, sexual type of love.
4. Agápe – This is unconditional love, it is sacrificial and it gives on all occasions.it cannot be withdrawn. It always loves. It is the love of the creator for the created. It is the greatest type of Love. The closest to the approximation of how God sees love. It is the definition of divine sacrifice – the love that God has for us – perfect; sacrificial; unconditional; gives of itself, it is selfless and is the highest and purest form of love.
‘Love has been defines as giving at the expense of self to the one that is loved.’
Giving of your time and attention, physical,material and being emotionally involved.
Many of the problems in the world today can be traced to lack of love. You must first love yourself and then your neighbour as you love yourself. The third is to love God if you are spiritual. Love yourself if no one else does, you owe yourself to love yourself. You must love yourself. Pure water can only come from a pure spirit. Love your neighbour – as you love yourself then you will be able to love your neighbour and express it.
‘Help your brother’s boat across and your own will reach the shore ‘- Hindu proverb.
Love is a currency. Every time we express love, we gain something else in return. Be a friend to many; refraining from character assassination, politics machinations and favouritism and treating everyone equally. Do to others as you would like them to do to you.
Relationships are based on love. There’s a power and value in relationships. Treasure and protect your relationships. Work on your relationships.
. ‘’Nothing in nature lives for itself. The rivers do not drink their own water; the trees do not eat their own fruit; the sun does not shine on itself, and flowers do not spread their fragrance for themselves. Living for others is a rule of nature. We are all born to help each other. No matter how difficult it is…Life is good when you are happy; but much better when others are happy because of you.’’ Pope Francis .Love is paramount to the Christian faith
◦Expression and attributes of love is in1 Corinthians 13.
Do not confuse love with a feeling. An atmosphere of love is at once welcoming, reassuring and comforting. You just never know when all someone needs ,at that point is your love. A kind word, of encouragement, thank you for appreciation of kindness, sorry if you are at fault helps.
‘’The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and to let it come in –‘’ Morrie Schwartz.
Inhibitors of Love
1. Fear of betrayal
Some people can’t bring themselves to love again because of some past experiences. It is usual for man not to show their own weakness, and the fact that someone betrayed you in the past should not stop you from continuing to love. Never let that stop you! Forgive them and forgive yourself. Seek counselling.
2. Selfishness and Self-centredness.
The world is All about ME! You must let it be about someone else. When will you do something for someone else for a change without expecting praise or recognition? What a wonderful world it will be if everyone thought about others. You don’t need to think less of yourself – just a little more about others.
3. Arrogance and ego.
Pride sometimes is a state of the heart where some people cannot just bring themselves to receive love. You must be willing to release yourself. You must be vulnerable to give and receive love. There is nothing wrong to receive expressions of love – make yourself vulnerable! The expression of love is not weakness, it is strength. We are made for love – that why God made a suitable help mate for Adam. In companionship and fellowship, we are not meant to do life alone. A life where there is no love is a life that is miserable!
4. Lack of reciprocity.
Don’t just be a receiver, learn to give back as well. If you want love to be unfettered (without chains), you must also learn to give back love no matter how little. A cup of tea, a simple thank you or a hug goes a long way. You may not be able to reciprocate to the one who showed you love but you can reciprocate to others. The more love there is in our lives the more life/light there will be in our world.
5. Wrong motives and objectives
If your giving of love is to gain something in return, then your giving is not unfettered. This is not love. True love gives and is willingly to let it go; motivated only by being selfless and not self-seeking. Love needs to be expressed, love sacrifices, reconciles, gives and serves. If your motive is wrong your love is chained and not unfettered.
Recommended reading about love 1 Corinthians 13 (any bible) This speaks about what true love is.